My New Year’s Day

For today’s Throwback Thursday, I’m sharing what has got to be one of the worst things I’ve ever written.  In my defense, however, I was only six at the time.  The whole thing is hilarious, and it’s a little scary how my six-year old brain worked.

First of all, I don’t know why all those people only had a one-bedroom house!  (Actually, I do.  I grew up as an only child.  It was just me and my grandparents.  We lived next door to an orange grove, so there weren’t any neighbors to play with.  And my grandma never wanted to “impose” on other people by allowing me to go play somewhere else.  So for me, being an only child was being a “lonely child.”  More than anything, I wanted a house full of kids to play with.)

Second of all, you’d think that everyone over eighteen would’ve been anxious to move out!  You can definitely see why Dad worked in Hawaii to get away from all that commotion.

Furthermore, when I told you yesterday that My Three Sons was one of my favorite TV shows when I was a kid, you can see here just how true that was (with the brother Ernie and cousins Chip and Robbie).

If you remember much about being little, you might remember that it was a HUGE DEAL to stay up past midnight!  So when Linda here stayed up until 4:30 AM, I can totally see why she thought it was the best New Year’s she ever had.  Of course, the fact that she’d only ever lived through four other New Year’s celebrations doesn’t give her much of a measuring stick.

I think the other hysterical part (besides the really bad spelling) is that I gave all this detail in the build-up, and then you blink and the story’s over.  There’s no conflict.  No resolution.  Just an expansive cast of characters in a single tiny room.

Below is the spelling-corrected version in case you can’t decipher my handwriting.  (By the way, do you notice how I made the star extra dark?  That was the year I finally learned how to draw a star all by myself, and it was a huge deal!

My New Year’s Day – January 1

Once upon a time, there was a little, brown shack on the side of a big, tall hill.  It had three rooms – a bedroom, a bathroom, and a kitchen.  At the house lived a girl named Linda.  Linda was only five years old.  She had four big brothers, and they were named John, Jimmy, Ernie, and Matthew.  She only had two big sisters named Sandy and Lisa.  Her cousins’ names were Chip and Robbie.  They lived with her, too.  She had a mom, and her dad was in Hawaii because he had to work there.  Sandy was fourteen, and Lisa was twenty-one.  John was twelve; Jimmy was sixteen; Ernie was seventeen; and Matthew was ten.  Chip and Robbie were nineteen.  “It’s finally December 31,” Linda said.  They stayed up until 4:30 in the morning.  Linda said it was the best New Year’s Day she ever had.  The End

Time to talk:  Did my story make you laugh?  What was the latest you ever stayed up when you were little?  If you were one of the older kids in this house, would you move?  Would you ever allow your spouse to work in Hawaii while you stayed home in a one-bedroom house with nine kids?

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